Worried About Rejection

Dear Harlan,

I met this guy over the Internet and I've seen him, but he hasn't seen me. I really like him, and I don't want to get rejected. I don't know how to tell him how I feel.

Worried About Rejection

Dear Worried,
You just tell him. Then you wait for a response. If he's interested, GREAT. If he's not interested, still GREAT. Thank him for not wasting your time and for being honest. Then move on to someone who can appreciate what it is you have to offer. This is called Risk-Taking/Rejection Research. It's all about facing The Universal Rejection Truth of Dating and Relationships. From your question, it's clear that you're not all that familiar with this truth. To familiarize you:

The greatest obstacle we face when taking a risk in love (and in life) is called The Universal Rejection Truth. The URT is an unspoken and largely secret truth that says, "NOT everyone we like will always like us." Rejection doesn't mean that you're not attractive or desirable; it just means that not everyone can be with everyone.

Sounds simple, but it's not. Most people (you included) can't handle The Universal Rejection Truth. But The URT is unavoidable. That's why you must start training immediately. Training is all about getting comfortable in your skin. It's changing things about yourself that can be improved (in a healthy way) and embracing what can't. For example, my ears stick out. Some women love them; some don't. I can't worry about the ones who don't - it's their loss. As you continue to take risk after risk, make sure to surround yourself with people who can remind you how attractive and desirable you are. It's easy to forget that when facing The URT. So take a risk; if you can't, start training. Then send me your stories. Remember, any risk taken is a success. I'll post risk-taking research as part of Rejection/Risk Awareness Week.