Hi Harlan,
How can I tell my husband in a way he will understand how I feel about his collection and use of pornography? We have talked about it several times, and he doesn't understand. I don't want him to see me naked, and I hate it when he touches me. I don't even enjoy sex, because I know he's not thinking of me. I'm embarrassed about my body because I can't compete with girls that are stuck in his mind. I'm studying criminal justice and am scared that my husband could be some secretive sicko (use of pornography is a pattern among criminals). Some of the porn I've found was nasty, and I feel so gross when I think about it. I get sick every time I see something that reminds me of porn (I've even vomited). I'm tired of being sick to my stomach. I'm so depressed and hurt. How can I make him understand?
How can I tell my husband in a way he will understand how I feel about his collection and use of pornography? We have talked about it several times, and he doesn't understand. I don't want him to see me naked, and I hate it when he touches me. I don't even enjoy sex, because I know he's not thinking of me. I'm embarrassed about my body because I can't compete with girls that are stuck in his mind. I'm studying criminal justice and am scared that my husband could be some secretive sicko (use of pornography is a pattern among criminals). Some of the porn I've found was nasty, and I feel so gross when I think about it. I get sick every time I see something that reminds me of porn (I've even vomited). I'm tired of being sick to my stomach. I'm so depressed and hurt. How can I make him understand?
Disgusted and Revolted
you just need to get over it, porn making you puke is pathetic. which brings me to my next point, on average in australia, every person squeezes 4 lemons per year. which means you should watch the porn with your husband, you might get a few pointers.
ReplyDeleteLOUD NOISES!
ReplyDeleteThis is one of the dummest things I've ever read.
ReplyDeleteYour husband will NEVER understand. Porn is just porn. Be happy he's not seeing a prostitute.
i can't believe what i'm reading in these comments! i apologize, ma'am, for the ignorance of these people. this is obviously an important issue and i want you to know that your very valid concern has connected with at least one soul out here. my advice is to, if you haven't already, be absolutely 100% straight-forward with him about how this makes you feel. give him examples, such as you gave in your question. in addition, you and your husband need to see a counsellor. from what it sounds like, this is not an option if you want this to get better. you two must get help from someone who is qualified to do so. obviously, the jerks who commented on this site are not the ones to turn to. keep strong, make sure you have friends/family who can help you through this, and remember why it is you fell in love with your husband in the first place. also, if you are not a praying woman, now would be a good time to become one. if i could hug you right now, i would. much love to you.
ReplyDeleteWow! Someone definitely needs some counseling, and its not your husband. Babe you got some serious issues and until you address them your going to feel sick for a long time and then your marriage will fail.
ReplyDeleteWhat does you criminology course say the percentage of men is that watch porn and DONT commit crimes.
I bet it doesn't.
I am a father of 4, been married for 15 years and love my porn. I don't molest, rape or sexually assault anyone. My wife doesn't have the same sex drive as I do, and its cool and I understand.
She is the total opposite of every "porn actress" ( and I use that term very loosely lol) but I am not thinking of them when we make love. I don't even think she is thinking about the male actors when we watch a porn movie and then have sex. Maybe she is. It wouldn't bother me.
The fact that you wont let him see you naked (because if you were 500 lbs and the ugliest women on the planet, there is not a porn movie in the world to compensate for that) and wont let him touch you, this me to believe that he feels shunned.
I am willing to bet, that you are also unwilling to please sexually or do the things give him any pleasure during sex. Hell I bet you wont even tell him what you want him to do during sex, or what he's doing wrong or right for that matter.
Bottom line is that if you keep thinking he's some kind of sicko, and acting like the frigid bitch that you have been, he will either find someone else to please him or leave you all together. Get some counseling for yourself because you really need it, then some with your husband. Marriage is a give and take relationship and I see your not giving it on the sexual side and he's taking it from the porn he's has.
Good luck.
Just another porn sicko
I agree with the self-declared porn sicko above. There are some deeper at issues at hand. The biggest one is your insecurity and the inability for either you or your husband to effectively communicate in the bedroom or elsewhere. Perhaps you should check out what Dan Savage has to say about men and porn.
ReplyDeleteMen just doesn't understand that most women have a distaste for porn. My advice is to sit down your husband and talk to him. Give him examples of why you don't like and why you won't let him touch you. Confess your vomiting and explain the reason why. He probably doesn't know why you acting the way around him. Don't let some cheap bad films drive a wedge in your marriage. Talk. Communicate. That's the only thing the fix problems between two people is talking it out. Anyway, that's just my two cents
ReplyDeleteI'm afraid the men in these replies have taken a very condecending and unhelpful tone. I'd like to give you a somewhat different male perspective and say that you definitely have a right to the feelings that you have and you should not just "get over them." However, you are making presumptions about your husband that may or may not be true, and this may make him very defensive.
ReplyDeleteI can only speak for myself, but I watch a lot of porn. When I am intimate with my girlfriend, I am not thinking of the porn, or the girls in it. Quite the opposite, when I am watching porn, I'm thinking about having sex with my girlfriend. Porn is a rather poor substitute for intimate sex with someone you love.
I have to agree with the comment that communication is the key, but I have to add that you should not only try to make him understand your distate, but also try to understand what he likes so much about it. This will be an unexpected question for him, so give him some time to think about it, and don't take answers like, "It's porn, all men like porn."
If you really press him to explain what he likes about it, the answers may surprise you and could range from, "I watch because I don't want to put sexual pressure on you," to "I like [insert "nasty" sex move]." Find out what kinds of porn he likes and dislikes (because all men have opinions).
What you discover may revolt you further, and whatever you do, don't let him make you feel guilty. But listen to him, and try to keep an open mind. It will help a lot. If you try to understand what he likes about it, he will feel less defensive when you explain what you dislike about it.
Of course, this is all assuming that your husband uses pornography in the way that most of us men do. That is to say, as a substitute when the real thing isn't available. If he is actually turning down sex with you to go into the next room and watch porn, he may have a legitimate problem. In that case, he may need the same kind of help that an alcoholic would need, but don't jump to that conclusion just because it disgusts you.
Well, this is all just one guy's opinion. Hope it helps. Good luck.
Men are visually turned on... and think about sex like at least ever minute of every day..:)
ReplyDeleteAnd hey it does not do anyone any harm, it helps some poor struggeling student pay for her sick mother/boob reduction/docterate.. (exc child thats just wrong) so why not just try embrase it.. I dare you, next time you see that glint in his eye as he makes his way to the computer, head up stairs and put on as little as possible and go sit on his lap. Men watch porn because they fear asking to have sex again and dislike rejection.. spice it up.. sex can get exiting again, you just gotta work (really hard) at it...
Porn is expensive, time consuming and GROSS. All the people who say you should get used to it are trying to force their opinion on you, you are aloud to hate it. You can feel any way you want and if your partner doen't like it you can move on. Stop feeling guilty, bad and sick and take action. You are in control of you.Let the rest of the posters who don't mind it hook up with your man.They can get their kicks together while your out interacting with real people.
ReplyDeleteThere are always choices... and both are making some; I wonder if either has thought them through? One aspect that solifies marriage is respect, another respect, and another - one of my favorites - that can heat me thoroughly, is (you got it): respect. Hubby likes porno? My guess he's a man. (I respect that) He leaves it out and around his primary female whom (one would think) he wished to be devoted to him? He doesn't have much forethought. Continues to keep this stuff as primary (as in she knows he prefers it to her) after she's expressed the profuntity of her distress? (he doesn't respect her). What ever happened to discretion? Does he also jack off in front of the kids? Probably not, most men would be offended at such a comment. And most women are offended at other women becoming primary in their own home. Most crass stuff should have a private place (that she doesn't investigate; and the kids truly can't find); and he, dear reader, needs to do some damage control. Because darlin' the issue isn't so much that the man want's to look, or responds to visual stimulous. It's possibly that he's subcumbed to an overexposure (like a gambler finding "free casino" on the internet), but what's absolutely true is that he's making his displayed, prominent, this-is-me-the-hell-with-you stash "the other woman", and putting her before you. It could be so-so-so-SO easy for him to put your mind at rest, let you know you're the one in his heart, the only one in his arms, and the rest is just sass for that right fist in private (make it easier for you to respect and not go there). Smart Alpha's know how to keep a strong broad cleve to them. But he's not doing this, is he? Silly boy, ignorant silly boy. If the woman doesn't have her place primary with him, why stay around? There are much stronger, smarter, and far more respectful men out there dear heart, who manage their live female & and enjoyment of that which is crash with respect for that which he wants to retain (he'd know how to have his cake and eat you too). Leave the boy dear; a man would know better.
ReplyDeleteMuch of modern porn is extremely degrading to women. I refuse to date anyone who looks at porn (there are plenty of men who don't).
ReplyDeleteMen who use porn are NOT good lovers.
To assume that men are incapable of restraining themselves from porn is to make not-very-nice assumptions about men.
How long have you dated the person who did not look at porn? Not long I suppose, and once you were out of his house he broke out the stash.
ReplyDeleteBut to Disgusted and Revolted. All men will look at porn, it does not mean they are secretive sickos. I will sometimes look up some porn while my girlfriend is out. I find some of this extremely disgusting stuff hilarious (fun to talk about when with other guys... "I once saw this chick take on a horse and dog at once... blah blah blah"). And my girlfriend will watch some porn with me, but it usually has to have a story (atleast as much of one as possible). But I'm not saying something is wrong with you for being disturbed by this.
On the other hand, the way you are reacting to him is wrong. If you turn yourself off from him completely, your husband will have no other place to "get his jollies off" but from porn.
What needs to happen is a good old talk to happen. And you need to COMPROMISE. You cannot expect him to drop his habbit just like that, but he cannot expect you just to get over it. Have a calm discussion and explain your feelings.
Also, porn acts as a way for men to visualize thier fantasies. But you could make it so that he does not need to visualize them. You could put on something provocative and give him some excitement. He will not be thinking about those porn stars when he has you. Remember he married YOU, if he wanted a girl who looked like a porn star I'm sure he could pick one up at a bar easily.
There are at least two sides to this that I can address.
ReplyDeleteI am fully in support of some kinds of porn. SOME. It's a release for those who need it, cheaper and less potentially troublesome than a cat house, and (when done right) won't effect any healthy relationship. My boyfriend has his collection, and he's welcome to it. As long as I'm a priority when we're together...
Not enough detail to say whether she's overreacting or there's a problem. If it's just standard (no beastiality, no snuff, no kiddie porn, no heavy violence, etc.), then it should just be porn. If it's on the list of WTF porn... well, I'd throw up, too.
If she's had some sort of trauma that causes her to have trouble dealing with porn (rape, molestation, etc.), then it's her job to tell him so. If he was aware of her having issues with it, then it's his job to respect that. I'm not saying he can't watch, but he should do so in a way that won't disturb her. Clearing out cookies and history, etc.
I've known at least one person who's sexual interests were so against my own that I could never date the guy. I'm big on consensuality and he's not.
Bottom line: if neither party can compromise, get out now and find somebody who better suits. If you think you can fix it, and it's worth fixing, give it a try.
Learn to let go. Do a few things the girls in the videos do. Just enough to please him
ReplyDeleteOkay, i think its wrong to say that she is at fault. If he husband is watching kiddie porn or something along that line, she has every right to be upset. Just saying, we may not have he full story
ReplyDeleteWhat is wrong with you people. Kiddie porn? Porn is porn. Eighteen year olds are children. There is no line to draw. All you husbands and fathers better be prepared for when your daughters start doing it, cause they might.
ReplyDeleteThen will it be okay when they are having sex with multiple people for your pleasure or do the rules suddenly change? Grow up and get healthy cause you really are sick. What kind of people are you? Porn is degrading and devaluing to women straight out not to mention the serious implications and consequences society faces today because of it. I feel for you and suggest counselling, I believe your husband can get healthy by making a conscience decision to give it up. Your marriage and sex life would be much stronger if you relied on your own imaginations and open communications. My heart goes out to you and good luck.
Hi there...
ReplyDeleteI am a woman and I guess I can almost understand your point of view. However, I enjoy porn and I encourage my boyfriend to look at it. I'm sorry that your husband's porn habit disgusts you, but it's a totally natural thing! Sex is natural, and finding healthy ways to release sexual tensions is important to a person's health.
I guess, like Harlan replied to PORN ENTHUSIAST today in the paper, that "we can live without it." Of course, I can live without fruit if I really wanted to, but it's a healthy part of my diet. I can choose not to eat fruit (just like you choose not to enjoy porn), but that's my choice, just like it's your husbands choice whether or not to look at pornography.
No matter what you saw that made you disgusted, sex is nothing new to the earth, and I can 100% guarantee you that whatever you saw has been going on for thousands of years, not matter what people say.
Every person has very different seuxal preferences, and you need to learn to be open to whatever they are. I suggest you be entirely open with your husband about this, no matter how hard it is, rather than writing to a columnist that knows nothing except for what you've told him. You could even go to counseling, together as a couple. But just remember that sex is as natural to humans as eating, drinking, and sleeping are--we NEED it because we need to procreate, and if your husband doesn't quite get what he needs without porn, it's understandble. I know I need more than what my boyfriend can give me, and that's ok; we've talked about it and he knows what I do. So just be open with your husband, and understanding as well.
Dear Disgusted,
ReplyDeleteIf you have explained how deeply your husbands interest in pornography affects him in the terms you have here, it would be impossible for him to not understand your concern. Have you? If you haven't, the first step is making a clear explanation as you have here. If you do that, or have done that, and he has no response at all, he either is unwilling to really listen to you on an important issue, or is dismissive and apathetic to your concern. In that case, there is a serious lack of respect in your relationship, and you should seek professional counseling.
That said, it also seems clear that the burden of resolving this conflict lies with both of you. You have not said that (1) your husband is addicted to porn, or watches porn all the time, or cannot function without watching porn throughout the day, (2) that your husband is not attracted to you, or (3) that your husband is not interested in a healthy, regular sex life with you. What you HAVE said is that (1) you feel unnatractive, (2) you can't stop thinking that he is fantasizing about porn stars while he's having sex with you, (3) are afraid that his use of porn means he could be a sex criminal, and (4) some porn is so nasty it makes you vomit.
Chances are, if your husband wants to make love to you on a regular basis, he is attracted to you. Chances are he is thinking about you, not porn actresses, while you make love. And since an overwhelming majority of normal men enjoy porn in some form, each having their own preferences and 'kinks,' chances are your husband is not a sexual predator waiting to come out.
The fact that you would so deeply fear this is an indication that your your fear and disgust over porn is irrational. At the same time, your embarassment about your body and your steadfast belief that your husband is never thinking of you in the bedroom shows that your self esteem is in need of serious work. Pornography is a small but significant component in the normal, healthy daily lives of a great many men, and it is not fair for you to ask him to give it up where it hasn't prevented him from being a complete husband to you. Your feelings, not his actions are what make this such a large problem in your relationship.
Marriage is a partnership, and requires the participation of both you and him in resolving problems. For his part, your husband needs to be sensitive to your feelings, have a meaningul dialogue on the issue, and make some concessions for your comfort. At the same time, though, you need to be willing to seek professional help to address your negative feelings, about porn, and even more importantly, about yourself.
I understand some of what you are saying because it hurts my feelings when my boyfriend looks at porn because I feel like it is not only weird but on some level disgusting to be looking at a complete stranger naked and having sex with someone else. You probably feel like "why am i not enough?" why does he have to sit there an gawk at another naked female to "get off" ? i dont get it personally, but it can be very hurtful. I feel like its cheating on some levels bc sex is something to share with your partner, just you and your partner, and its just a turn off to see him looking at some nasty porno flick! You should try to turn it around on your husband and buy some porn that is made for women and look at it right in front of him and pretend to masturbate to it or whip it out durng sex and see how he likes it! I have a feeling that once you volunteer to watch porn with him (choosing from "your collection" of naked men) he may begin to see your point. Good luck!!
ReplyDeleteI've experienced a similar situation with my boyfriend of 6 years (I'm 21, he is 22). We haven't had a conversation that has sufficiently calmed my anxiety over the whole issue, so I don't really feel like I have any great advice or anything (I think this post originated over two years ago..). But for what it's worth, I know exactly how you feel. I've been searching the internet for information on this subject, and I keep seeing the same thing:
ReplyDelete"Porn appeals to men because they are more visual that women" or "Humans are not naturally monogamous, and men need a way to fantasize"
I've heard many people say "all men look at porn," or "men need porn."
But we haven't always had porn in the modern sense. The camera is a relatively recent invention on the human timeline. Before all of the movies and girly-mags, there certainly was erotic literature and dirty illustrations. But we haven't always had porn.
I don't really need to say this, but if men NEEDED porn, the human race would not exist.
I understand the need and desire to satisfy one's sex drive by masterbating.
But do you HAVE to use the porn to do so?
I think porn hinders the imagination, and reliance upon it reflects laziness and a lack of creativity.
I oppose my partner's use of pornography because he is physically engaging with and reacting to an external factor that is outside of our relationship. Using porn is not the same as cheating, or even visiting a strip club, but it is similar in that the user/view ACTIVELY utilizes something outside of the relationship.
I'm not sure how to better explain this..
but one other thing:
most (not all) pornography is degrading to humans, by which I mean BOTH men and women.
Remember that no one is perfect.
hey there all you sick porn addicts!!! porn is not normal and it is considered infidelity, CHEATING on your spouse! and what happens when porn isn't enough anymore? hmmm lets seee...phone sex! and then what? oh i know hookers!!!!!and don't forget teen porn! leave this lady alone! she is NOT the 1 with a problem its her husband who has a problem and by the sounds of it you fella's as well.i use this 1 when my husband says "its perfectly normal to look at naked women" and i say..."ok" give me your credit card" why he asks? my reply...to do what comes naturally to women of course! whats that he asks? SHOP TILL I DROP!!! give me a break! its called self control you sick pervs!!!! you guys need HELP for you sick addiction.
ReplyDeletei sympathize with this woman. i can relate to how upsetting this can be for you. i too have the same problem. my boyfriend has a lot of porn in the house which i found because he was careless and left it lying around when i was cleaning the house. first i found adult porn, now i,ve found teen porn,and i have a 14 year old daughter in the house. not only that ,she,s found his underwear in her room when she comes home from school a few times. not lately though....so please can someone me tell that porn is harmless and that i should get over it.i,ve tried telling myself that its a guy thing and not to take it personally, but what should i tell my teenage daughter?should i tell her "its ok dear its just a guy thing and its perfectly normal"
ReplyDeleteI can tell you that I gave him a taste what it feels like.I went to a site just for women straight men mast.Also just pictures and got play girl.He was sooooooooo made he said I dont see why you feel the need to see other men,I dont but it sure was a great whats good for you is good for me.You dont have to watch it just put it on the computer so he will find it.And then just watch what happens.Never get mad get even.Men are scared you will see some one who has a bigger I think you know what.
ReplyDeleteI can tell you that I gave him a of taste what it feels like.I went to a site just for women straight men mast.Also just pictures and got play girl.He was sooooooooo mad he said I dont see why you feel the need to see other men,I dont but it sure was a great way to say whats good for you is good for me.You dont have to watch it just put it on the computer so he will find it.And then just watch what happens.Never get mad get even.Men are scared you will see some one who has a bigger I think you know what.Repost got a phone call and hit wrong letters.
ReplyDeleteI had similar feelings about porn until my husband explained to me that: 1. He is fantasizing about us being together in those positions and senarios. 2. It's about variety, you can't be everything to everyone. 3. He want's sex more often than my body can handle, so he "rubs one out" while picturing me in those pictures. 4. My husband prefers the video and pics of me to anything else. 5. Sometimes I'm not available, like right before work, or when I'm out with the girls.
ReplyDeleteYou just have to feed his appitite. But at the same time, explaine to him that cuddleing is your "porn," i.e.: it's what gets you in the mood. He will give more and you should reciprocate.
The most important thing is to talk about it. Talk about it without acuzation and assumptions.
Use "I feel" instead of "you do/are/make me."
Be open so he feels like he can confess his deeper feelings.
Last but not least: men are wired to like porn from birth. They are visually stimualted.
I could say much more but you should hear it from your man.
Message to everyone who says she is overreacting and to get over it. You are absolutely the kind of megalomaniacal self-centered jerks that characterizes heavy porn users. You people are addicts and you never hear an addict scream louder than when you criticize or threated to remove thier fix.
ReplyDeleteF-U. I am a wife. I do look like the girls in my husband's favorite pictures. My husband gives me the same BS about "i'm thinking about you." Crap. abosolute crap. what makes him a selfish prick is that much like the rest of you MY feelings are irrelevant. I AM not allowed to be offended by being "presented with tastful displays of anal sex, multiple participants and ejaculate, and wet play." It is fricking disgusting and I don't want to see it. Never mind that I have broken down and done some of these things (disgusted the whole time) because it was important to him.
But when it comes to me saying, enough! Here's the boundary, don't cross it. OH NO WAYYYY, I am a prude, a killjoy blah blah blah.
And that presentation he made? 50% of it was anal sex. I mean just raw and disgusting and he wonders why I dont want his filthy hands on me.
what I do with my husband is supposed to be sacred. he says he worships me, but I feel like a dog shit covered alabaster statue, and just as mute. He will not listen to me. Everything becomes an attack on his sexuality but his attacks on my sexuality are some kind of improvement plan, I guess.
I can deal with it if he keeps it hidden. Out of sight out of mind. Call me a wimp, but that is how it has been. Last night, I made the mistake of letting him show me this Presentation he had been working on. He said it was all very tastful and aesthetic.
I don't know how tasteful a few guys using someone's spread open anus for target practice is.
But then again, I'm the prude.
Go to the christian sites for men addicted to porn. You'll find rational support. You have a right to your feelings.
Nothing is ever enough for my husband. Sex becomes a chore. It really does. I never faked orgasims in my life. Now I fake them about 85% of the time. He just doesn't turn me on anymore. We will be halfway through and I will think we are having a great time and he will say "It would be really great if I could just ..." and it would be something that was in one of the pictures.
Who I am and what I have to offer him is just not enough. He has fed his mind with pornography for 30 years and it has destroyed his reference point of what is usual.
He wants a porn movie acted out in our bedroom every morning, every afternoon and every night. And if I don't want to waste 3 hours out of a busy day in bed with him - he says my priorities are messed up. Even though the house goes uncleaned, bills go unpaid, my grades suffer...doesn't matter. 3 hours of sex and 3 hours of tv, every single day.
These men are boys who never grew up. They stopped emotionally maturing when they began to focus thier emotions on thier sex organs. My father used to say, When sex enters into a relationship, the relationship stops maturing.
Sex is something you wait for. It's not something that you pop like candy into your mouth through porn rags all through your teens.
Honey, these men are damaged. Ignore what they say. I know you you feel. I KNOW HOW YOU FEEL and its okay. Anyone who doesn't like that .... go shove your head in some smut - but don't presume to beleive your activities and your attitudes are polite, sensitive or acceptable. Because they are not.
Women degrade themselves when they participate in pornography. These guys think all women should do so.
sometimes...I wonder if it is about sex at all. Based on these posts, it sure sounds like male/female control issues.
I would like to restrain all of you nasty jerks and beat you until the flesh falls off your body. That is how much I despise you and your attitude.
SHE HAS A GOD DAMMNED RIGHT TO HER FEELINGS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!1
Hello. I am in a similar situation. My husband and I have had many horrific arguments about porn. I read once that if you are doing something you have to hide from your significant other, then that thing you are doing is cheating plain and simple. This makes sense to me. I am hot in the bedroom and give him whatever he wants. I talk, dress up whatever. But, my husband looks at things I can never give him. Black porn for example. How am I, a white woman, supposed to compete with sexy black women? He has gotten so bad in the past, that we never had sex together. Now it is starting again. I have tried to watch with him and all of that but he doesn't like to watch it with me because he feels like he has to compete with the male actors. He has told me that he imagines other women while we are intimate. Makes me wonder what the hell I am doing here at all. He obviously doesn't need me here. I get propositions all the time and if it weren't for my kids, I would act on them. Cheating is cheating after all. And all of you that think that porn is not a big deal, get over yourselves. Relationships are for intimacy and respect. Those that primarily look at porn for whatever reason, are being completely selfish and disgusting. Reach out and really touch your partner. You chose them, they chose you. My advice to you fellow romantic, dump the guy if you can. I will live vicariously through you. cheers!
ReplyDeleteYour husband is a PIG. Porn is just another way of cheating on your spouse. Women licking and sucking on each other is GROSS.
ReplyDeleteAnd watching another couple or group sex is like animals. I would hope we could all rise above that behavior. Dump him and find someone worthy of your love and comitment to a marriage.
I wanted to write a kind response and try to address this as a genuine problem on both sides. Frankly, I can't do it. Lady, you have horrible self esteem and a poor self image. This is not your husband's fault, nor is it the fault of the girls in the magazines, it is your fault and yours alone.
ReplyDeleteYou honestly sound like a child. To get physically ill over the thought of pornography is silly.
Print off your post and take it to a counselor and start from there. It sounds like you're making your husband equally miserable.
Wow, I'm completely and utterly disgusted by the guys who have found it necessary to comment on this, absolutely awful. It's not okay for you to be feeling that way and I might admonish couple's counselling.
ReplyDeleteCrickey, some guys sure don't know what to do with their free time, after all, idle hands are the devil's workshop, surely these males could be doing something more constructive than watching porn.
and this is coming from a guy.